Well, now that several ‘crashes’ have been resolved (mostly), I have done the following.
1) Got a good night’s sleep
2) Went shopping with my restored money card
3) Woke up early and made real coffee
4) Took a nice long shower
5) Decided to entirely re-do my webpage
Somehow, lethargy, possibly depression, a sense of defeat and not caring anymore had caught me. THe days just slipped away. I know I spent a week in bed with leg muscle aches, and a filthy room with clothes everywhere, and trash piling up. But something changed after Thanksgiving and visiting the Bowery Mission again, seeing how far I’d come. I plowed through some negatives I had and found they started getting resolved as I almost thought they wouldn’t.
There are still things to resolve but just keeping on the details, even from the edge of Fukidol, have brought me to the point where I can see how easy it will be to just keep on doing what I know needs to be done. And it isn’t DIFFICULT! Heck, most things in my life are not difficult, but thinking makes them so.
Who knows, I might even enjoy Christmas this year.
I will be 60 years old, which causes me grave concern since I figured I’d be buried by now.
Well here I am, I can’t dance anymore, so I might as well re-design my website. So there. Phhhhbt!